Summary ep 14

Coming home from a movie, Marissa and Ryan note that only one more day is left in 2003, which has been quite a year for them. They're both looking forward to celebrating the new year together, but when Marissa suggests maybe dropping in on a party, Ryan counters that maybe they should take it easy after her Christmas boozefest. They can stay in where they know they'll be safe. A little kissing and hugging and Marissa whispers "I love you." Ryan's stunned silence creates an awkward moment. He thanks her for the sentiment, making it more awkward and Marissa jumps in her car to get home before curfew.

Back in the sanctity of the pool house, Ryan asks himself how hard it is to say "I love you" back. A strange girl comes out of the bathroom - in Ryan's tank top and what is presumably her own underwear - to tell him it's not that hard. And to ask what he's doing in her pool house. Ryan debates ownership of the pool house domain and pointedly asks who she is. She's Kirsten's sister, Hailey. And she's staying in the pool house, so Ryan can have the couch. It's pretty comfortable.

Day breaks and Seth comes downstairs, surprised to find Ryan on the couch. Hailey's here? Seth asks his parents where Hailey is, and they assume she's off in some far-flung land. They're unpleasantly surprised to find out she's actually only fifty yards away. Why is she here? Sandy guesses that she's out of money. Hailey, still partially dressed, struts into the kitchen with cheery welcomes for all. She would've called, but her cell phone was shut off. And…um…she'll be staying for a while.

Hailey asks Ryan and Seth about the New Year's plans, and then leaks Ryan's inability to speak about love. So it looks like they'll all be staying in tonight. Elsewhere, Marissa wraps up her therapy appointment. Naturally, Oliver is in the waiting room. He invites her to his New Year's party at his place. In the Four Seasons? He'll explain. Marissa deftly mentions she'll be there with her boyfriend, but Oliver doesn't miss a beat. His girlfriend will be there too! They can all meet!

Kirsten and Hailey share some icy sisterly bonding, and when Hailey observes Kirsten and Sandy communicating with mere phrases instead of sentences, she mocks her sister for being old and boring. And that's enough to make Kirsten ditch her annual tradition of dinner and Dick Clark in favor of partying it up. Because she is not old!

Conversely, Ryan is rejecting Marissa's invitation to party. Who's this Oliver anyway? Ryan tries to steer the conversation back to their awkward moment last night, but still can't get the words out. Anyway, he's staying in. Well, Marissa's going, so if you change your mind, here's the invitation.

True to his word, Ryan is staying in. Only now he's playing video games with Seth instead of dirty games with Marissa. Sandy and Kirsten are stepping out, and Hailey is all too quick to usher them on their way. Hailey thinks the coast is clear, but is surprised to see Seth and Ryan on the couch. You're really staying in? Hailey plants all kinds of seeds in Ryan's head about his chick being all alone on New Year's, with only this "Oliver" there to kiss her. Ryan and Seth are soon dressed and Hailey is all too quick to usher them on their way as well. When they open the door to leave, a screaming stream of party people flow into the house, spraying champagne and breaking stuff. Hailey's claim to lay low tonight maybe wasn't so honest.

Summer and Marissa make the scene at the Four Seasons penthouse. Summer lays the same rap on Marissa that Hailey just laid on Ryan. How you spend New Year's is how you'll spend the year. So the girls are going to spend tonight not thinking about Ryan and Seth and how they're sitting home. Hey! Anna's here! And so is Oliver, who's only too happy to see Marissa.

At a wilder party, Ryan and Seth debate leaving. Ryan can't be away from Marissa and Oliver tonight! But Seth can't leave Hailey here alone to trash the place. Ryan tracks down Hailey in another room and overhears her arguing with a friend. Apparently, the friend wants the $3,000 Hailey owes her and reminds her that she doesn't have any friends left in town. That spat ends and Ryan threatens to call the cops if Hailey doesn't end the party. Hailey calls him a nark and thinks they can talk about this.

Sandy and Kirsten arrive at their party after a car ride filled with wondering if their marriage is in a boring rut. Which is interesting, because it seems that Hailey has sent them to a swingers party. The hostess tells Sandy to drop his watch in a bowl, and the Cohens think about dropping themselves in reverse. But then they start thinking maybe they're too boring to stay and daring each other. Dare. Double dare! Double dare back! Next thing you know, Sandy has deposited his watch in the sex bowl with nary a word from Kirsten.

Meanwhile, Hailey is leading Ryan and Seth to the pool house to talk about the party. They go in first and Hailey steps back and locks them inside. Seth begins to panic as his claustrophobia sets in. Ryan reminds him he's in a giant pool house.

At Party C - the swinging one - Sandy is making himself a new friend with some dazzling conversation. A worried Kirsten sits by herself, but the hostess tries to relax her. Swinging saved her marriage. Sometimes you don't realize your marriage is in a rut until somebody wakes you up. That doesn't ease Kirsten's worries.

At Party B - the Four Seasons one - Summer and Anna are kinda bored. Until they spot a cute boy smiling at them. But which one? Summer drags Anna over and forces the guy to choose. Anna thinks this is weird and says he's not her type anyway. Well who's your type?! Seth Cohen?! Oh. Awkward. Anna slides off.

Across the room, Oliver has found a weakness and is gunning for it. So, your boyfriend didn't say I love you back? Interesting. He reassures Marissa in that way a guy trying to steal somebody's girlfriend might. Which is to say disingenuously.

Back at Party C, Sandy is ready to go, but now Kirsten is entrenched. They are in a rut! And she's swinging! All right, fine. Sandy starts working the room again. Over at Party A - the Hailey one - Ryan is ticking off the seconds until he doesn't kiss his girlfriend at midnight. And they both kick themselves in the ass for blowing it with their girls. Then some bad girls show up looking for Hailey so they can punch her. Hailey scurries to the pool house to get Ryan and Seth's help in clearing out the party before the bad girls destroy the house. They shut off the power and tell people the cops are coming, which clears the place out. Leaving Ryan enough time to race over to Marissa's open arms.

Time for the drawing of the watches. Many new couples are formed, but Sandy and Kirsten are left standing. The last woman before Kirsten draws and pulls out the last watch. Sandy snuck his watch out of the bowl, the sly dog! The Cohens head home together.

Anna is left by herself at Oliver's party. Nobody to talk to, nobody to kiss. So she's going to take off. Sandy and Kirsten arrive home to their trashed abode. Hailey promises it's nothing she can't clean up, but Kirsten rightly lays into her, telling her it's time to grow up.

Seth is hauling out the trash when he comes across Anna. She didn't want him to be alone on New Year's. So they share a moment. Ryan arrives at the Four Seasons and races up the stairs to the penthouse. He opens the door at 11:59:57 and rushes in - in slow motion! - to kiss Marissa at the exact right moment. Leaving Oliver to hold his sparkling cider alone.

It's New Year's! Ryan and Marissa are kissing. Sandy and Kirsten are about to start kissing. Seth and Anna lie on his bed really kissing. Summer is kissing some guy, but backs off, saying "You're not Seth Cohen." Six out of seven happy new years is a good start.